One of the things that I love most about Scripture is how you can thumb past a passage time and time again without it having any real connection until, WHAM!, one day when you are in a particular spiritual space, it suddenly comes into focus.
This morning, the few lines of Psalm 131 had a significant effect upon me:
My heart is not proud, O Lord,
my eyes are not haughty;
I do not concern myself with great matters
or things too wonderful for me.
But I have stilled and quite my soul;
like a weaned child with its mother,
like a weaned child is my soul within me.
O Israel, put your hope in the Lord
both now and forevermore.
I confess that my heart has been proud:
full of selfish desire and ambition,
of secret wants and dreams;
I’ve been patting myself on the back
and holding my chin up high
in defiance of those who have neither seen nor affirmed me.
I confess that my eyes have been haughty:
that I have looked down on
~ those less educated,
~ those less articulate,
~ those less spiritual,
~ those less self-sacrificing,
in denial of my own inner poverty.
I confess that I have reached for things beyond me:
~ wisdom beyond my years,
~ position beyond my station,
~ meaning beyond my calling;
~ priorities beyond what truly gives me life
out of envy for what I could be missing out on.
Still my soul.
Quiet my restless.
Tame my thoughts.
Curtail my desire to rush after that which will harm me.
Let me settle into Your motherly arms.
Let me enjoy being rocked back and forth to a place of calm.
Let the lullaby of Your love
affirm my belonging, my security,
and drive away my doubts and uncertainties.
And as my eyes grow heavy,
and my heart grows full of You,
and my head falls in perfect peace against Your chest
to better hear Your heartbeat,
fill my dreams with the hope
~ of home,
and an eternity with You
in such unbridled intimacy.